The right words
by vegi burger
Summary: A fillin scene for ‘A Vineyard Valentine’. “…but staring at that necklace, so clearly not picked by him, she just really needs to hear him say it…”


It wasn't the first time he had said it, but somehow, this time, it had carried a special meaning. It was his 'I am all in'. It was her 'will you marry me'. Three simple words she had heard plenty of times before, but somehow, whenever he said them, they had the power to break her heart and rebuild it all at the same time. A part of her wishes he would say it all the time, to never stop hearing it, but another part of her is glad that it's this way, those little moments, from time to time, somehow making it even more meaningful.

But tonight, she really needed to hear it. She knows it, of course she knows, but lately she's been feeling like he's drifting away, and she doesn't think she has the right to pull him back in, not from his own daughter. He doesn't mean to hurt her. He never does. And most of the time, she can put on her brave face and just handle it, until it passes, but staring at that necklace, so clearly not picked by him, she just really needs to hear him say it, to feel him feel it, to know that he is there and that he's not going anywhere, that she isn't basing her dreams on… dreams.

And then he goes, and he says it, in that special 'Luke' way of his that never fails to make her smile, and she is at a loss for words. Well, not all words, just those she really means to say. It's been like that with him forever. It was never him she proclaimed her love to. It was the diner, it was his coffee, it was the flowers and it was the necklace. It was a stupid bed set. And there she goes again:

"I really love this necklace."

"Good. I'm glad you do. You deserve it."

"Yes, it's really… beautiful" she looks at the necklace then back at him. Deserve. "You didn't pick it, did you?"

"I…"helooks at her dumbstruck. Regretful. Busted "No. I'm sorry. I didn't. How did you know?"

"No way in hell you know what a tennis bracelet is. Don't I _deserve_ something you picked?"

"That's not it… you deserve… **everything**… and it's not like I forgot or anything… I didn't… I was just thinking about giving you something ON Valentine's Day, not today… but then Logan came and told me he was giving Rory her present today… and asked me what I was getting you… and I didn't want you to get upset thinking I forgot about you… I just thought I still have some time left, that's all, and he told me he got a spare gift and this was our 'male bonding' thing, and I just thought- why not? I mean, I thought you'd like it…"

"I do like it. I just wish it would have been from you and not from… Logan."

"I know. I'm sorry. You WILL get something from me, I promise. I was just so busy with… everything that I just… I'm sorry."

"You've been sorry a lot lately."

"I know… I'm sorry… I…" he's clutching his face with frustration, looking lost, making her want to reach out for him "I've been so stupid."

"No… not stupid. Never stupid." She takes his hands back to hers, pulling him a little closer "It's just that you suddenly have this new… ball… to juggle… a big, heavy, unexpected ball… and you're trying to adjust to that… I get that… but I wish that didn't mean you have to put your 'Lorelai ball' on the side. I mean, it's not like the 'Lorelai ball' is rolling anywhere, but still… it would be nice… to get… juggled sometimes."

He chuckles and kisses her temple. "You are the only person I know who can make 'juggling' sound dirty."

"What can I say?" She smiles at him "It's a gift."

"Among many", he returns her smile and his eyes glisten. Then he gets serious again, and comes even closer. His face is now only inches from hers. "Lorelai… I want you to know… I NEED you to know… the 'Lorelai ball'… it's never on the side. I never put it aside. I may not…'play' with it all the time… but that is only because I wouldn't want to accidentally drop it… but I'm keeping it safe and it's always with me…"he takes their joined hands to his chest "…right here."

Her eyes are getting teary again. "Boy," she mumbles as she eliminates whatever distance remained between them "you really know how to kill a metaphor…"

As her lips meet his and his arms slide around her, for the first time in weeks, she feels light. Well, maybe not exactly 'light'… but she feels… right, and safe, and stable. She feels loved. She pulls him into bed with her and deepens the kiss as soon as he's settled under her. She plants small kisses all over his face, and stops to look at him. The look in his eyes overwhelms her. How could she ever doubt him?

"I'm sorry you're not having fun this weekend"

"Its okay" he mumbles softly while caressing her back.

"I thought this could be fun… a romantic valentine's weekend away… just the two of us…" she can't help but laugh at herself a little when she realizes "and my daughter… and… her boyfriend"

She starts giggling with embarrassment, at her self, at her foolish actions and good intentions. She falls back to bed, the tears that have been threatening to burst earlier from sadness and emotion, finally burst out at her giggling fit.

"Oh, yes" she goes into her snotty English accent act again "a weekend at the vineyard… how delightful… we shall stay with the Huntzbergers at the beach house…" and the fit only gets worse "Oh, I know! Why don't we go snorkeling or canoeing in the middle of February? That wouldn't be at all eccentric… or dangerous…" her face are starting to get red "and honestly, Darling, how could it possibly be that hanging out with my post-teen daughter and her filthy rich on-and-off boyfriend doesn't get you in a romantic mood?"

"hey…" he leans down to her, rubbing her stomach, his hand gliding over the soft and slick material "don't… this weekend was a great idea… it could be just what we both needed… it's me who's been acting like…" his hand keeps gliding up her body, finally reaching her face, cupping her cheek "and you know, this weekend isn't over yet…"

"No?"

"Nope. Still got plenty of potential…"

"Oh, yeah?"

"Especially if you keep talking with that sexy accent…"

"Does it tickle your fancy?"

"Uh… yeah, sure. Why not."

As a trail of light kisses makes its way down her neck, she forgets why she was upset in the first place, she forgets what could possibly not be right between them, she forgets that Rory is right down the hall, and she forgets all the other things she wanted to say to him. All, but one, too important to forget, too intense to ignore, and for once, she has the right words:

"Luke?"

"Yes?"

"I love you too."


End file.
